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Part 6: Progress

25 Mar
English: Progress 20% Polski: Postęp 20%

English: Progress 20% Polski: Postęp 20% (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

We had booked the marriage counselling appointment and were feeling hopeful. In the mean time we tried some of the things he had suggested trying. We couldn’t get to Ann summers in the end due to a change in work schedules but I dressed up – (I’m creative, I’m good at making something out of nothing…aren’t most women good at that? lol,)- we role played and although nothing changed physically, the emotional connection between us felt stronger. The trust had grown, we felt comfortable enough to express ourselves and the pressure had lessened as we focused more on having fun and enjoying ourselves.

We even got as far as pleasuring ourselves…together. A BIG step for both of us as I knew how much of a private thing that was for him and to be honest I never really did that myself so the experience was liberating. It made me feel closer to him, it was a good way for me to learn from him…but overall it was amazing to know he was satisfied and removed the fear of him sneaking off to do it alone.

We took it slowly, first ourselves, then each other….and then it happened…he climaxed and I was responsible for it. For the first time in a year -and the second time in our relationship- I did it for him. OK so it wasn’t through intercourse but it was still my doing and for us that was a big achievement and a big relief.

Over the next week the progress kept coming (excuse the pun), we took it further, lights off first, then lights on but with me blindfolded (as he felt embarrassed but still liked the visual) and eventually lights on but with him blindfolded to heighten his senses. It worked every time and with the small changes each time but the end of the week we were feeling better than ever…finally I felt like I was enough for my husband.

xBx

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10 responses to “Part 6: Progress

  1. greenembers

    March 25, 2013 at 10:38 am

    Can I say awesome or is there more to the story? I think it is awesome that you’ve been able to work together and make progress.

     
    • Comfortably Numb

      March 25, 2013 at 11:06 am

      I was thinking exactly the same thing at the time….but theres a lot more to come :/ (good and bad though)
      You are currently half way through the backstory – im such a tease arent i? lol xB

       
      • greenembers

        March 25, 2013 at 11:58 am

        Yeah, just a bit. Teaser. Well I hope good is really good and bad is not so bad.

         
  2. beetleypete

    March 25, 2013 at 12:00 pm

    On first reading, it seems as if progress was being made; at least the physical results were apparent, and undeniable! However, reading again,from a purely male viewpoint, I am feeling uneasy. The role play, and general contrivance necessary to achieve those ‘results’, seems to me to be indicative of serious underlying problems. I am not remotely prudish, and wholeheartedly support any experiment that enhances love-making, and with it, a relationship. The problem is, that all this should be – as well as – not ‘instead of’. I have a sense of foreboding here, and I anticipate the next chapter with some disquiet. Still, it can only help you to open up, and I am sure it will prove to be a worthwhile exercise. Regards as always, Pete. X

     
    • Comfortably Numb

      March 25, 2013 at 12:19 pm

      Thanks Pete, yes I agree completely. it was progress -but to a point. The idea was to find a way to break this barrier he had built subconsiously (I cant spell today) and then work backwards. To find a way to make him lose control, to stop worrying and then work back to basics.
      Like I’ve said, im all up for trying things and having fun but i totally agree, it should be as well as the normal stuff – nothing wrong with a bit of missionary lol. I wasnt 100% happy with having to put on a show for him every time, what spouse WOULD be happy with the knowledge that plain and simple them wasnt enough? but i was willing to try it if it would help to knock down those walls.

      This occasion, this progress made me feel so much better, closer to him, relieved. these were the results we had been waiting for…but of course there is more to come :/ xB

       
  3. beetleypete

    March 25, 2013 at 1:36 pm

    B. I think that you are well aware of the problems of the Internet, and access to uncontrolled Pornography. The whole subject is worthy of a full post, if not its own blog! All those generations of (male) fantasies now coming ‘alive’ for them to see acted out, before their eyes, at least on a computer screen. It will never be long before watching is just not enough, and they have to try to realise them ‘in the flesh’. I have looked at enough in my time, but I suppose my age, and generation, applied the necessary checks and balances, and suppressed unrealistic expectations. With younger people, and the video game legacy prevailing, some end up feeling that nothing is impossible.
    The reality is never the same as the fantasy, so disappointment follows. I fear we are unleashing a Pandora’s Box on society in general, with no idea where it will eventually take us. Your experiences should rightly act as a warning, to others considering taking a similar path. Happiness only comes from real human contact. Everything else is a sham. As ever, Pete. X

     
    • Catmandue

      March 26, 2013 at 6:06 am

      You seem to me to be an intelligent up-to-date person and I like reading your comments.

      Your fear of unleashing Pandora’s Box on society in general is a valid one.

      Recent breakthroughs in things like Google Glasses (http://www.google.com/glass/start/how-it-feels/) as just one example show that the future can be *very* interactive.

      And then there is VerSpanken (http://stagshop.com/V-rSpanken-Bumpy-Green.html), a new and exciting way for men to masturbate. Probably don’t even need any porn the first or second time it is used. But after that, you can be sure that porn will be involved.

      Also… business’ like that Stag Shop used to be confined to a little hole in the wall somewhere in a dark alley.

      Now they have a large number of retail locations, and will enthusiastically assist you with anything you might have an eye toward purchasing.

      I know this because there is one nearby where I purchase lubrication products. The woman I have sex with does not produce enough natural lubrication, and we need the lube. Ergo, I go to a store to buy it. The Stag Shop is closest, and has the best retail price for lube.

      You should know that a bottle of lube lasts a very, very long time, and going to the Stag Shop is the exception to the rule. I only mention I was there in order to establish my credentials as a person who knows what is available for purchase.

      And now back to our in-progress comment:

      So… Google Glasses combined with realistic feeling masturbation devices… you can see for yourself where that is going to lead… you don’t need me to spell it out.

      But, as you say, and I agree, real happiness is only available with human contact. But… does that contact *have* to be in person, in the flesh, so to speak?

      I was going to say that a person alone cannot be happy, but I know that is in fact quite untrue.

      I know lots of people who live by themselves, and maintain only virtual relationships with people they know and love.

      Actually, all of the people I have met, have good discussions with, and perhaps befriended have *ALL* been started on, and mostly continue on with, on the internet. Every. Single. One. Of. Them.

      I have never met any of the people I now call friends. I have had a virtual relationship with them on Facebook for years now. Aside from the inherent problems associated with physically meeting up with someone you only know from online communication, there are simpler problems: they may live thousands of miles away from you. It is too expensive to actually go and meet someone like that.

      So, to me it looks like a person *can* be happy without physical contact. I’m happy, and I only know *you* because I read a comment you left here, on a blog, in a virtual reality.

      Although you and I may not see eye to eye on everything (and that would be boring, wouldn’t it?), I have already developed a certain respect for you, based solely on the comments you have left on this blog.

      To get back to the point… the future will be, as it always has been, a mixed up, made up, make what you can of it, eventuality that *is* going to come to pass.

      And I am almost certain that there is no arguing with that.

      Respects and cheers,

      .rob.

       
      • Comfortably Numb

        March 26, 2013 at 11:38 am

        Thank you again, I realise you are responding to Petes comments but anyway…

        I agree, contact doesnt have to be in person, before marriage my husband and i would have intimate skype dates and phone calls, we would talk each other through it and felt strongly connected by doing so. If being alone makes someone happy then they should not bring others into it…why lie? why propose? why live together? why put them through something that you dont really care about?

        Virtual relationships exist, it takes away the shallowness (im saying thats a word lol) of physical appearance. it stops pre judgements, you learn about them as a person rather than ignoring them based on something which may deter you in the real world (sad but true) you bond on common interests and relationships grow.

        My husband and i used the internet to learn more about each other in the first month after meeting…i thought at the time it made us stronger, that i knew him more intimately than if our relationship was based on physical attraction or sex…but thats turned out to be false.

        I enjoy reading your comments, as i said previously they add another level to my thought process in all of this so thank you for getting my brain working.

        xB

         
  4. behindthemaskofabuse

    March 25, 2013 at 8:59 pm

    I’ve read the comments so I know there’s more to the story, but I’m glad you at least had good moments. 🙂

     

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